「真誠的關係,是動態的辯證關係,是一種持續不斷地給予和接納的過程。在此關係中,個人表達自我,在對方那裡尋得答案,
然後,他可能會逾越界線,感受到對方的拒絶。
因此,他向後退一步,這並非放棄,
而是為了把參與關係的形式帶往另一個層次,
更為了找到能保有彼此完整性的相處方式。
像這樣在與他人的關係中,表達出自我的個體性,
便是原魔的建設性運用。
這個動力辯証關係,永遠遊移在剥削伴侶的邊緣,然而少了它,關係便會失去生命力」
~~摘錄自 羅洛 .梅--[愛與意志]
反思:
處在邊緣,是指在tango裡表達出脆弱的自己,還是更有力道的表達需求?
A dynamic dialectical relationship--I am tempted to call
it a balance, but it is not a balance--is a continuous give and
take in which one asserts himself, finds an answer in the
other, then possibly asserts too far, senses a "no"in the
other, backs up but does not give up, shifts the participation
to a new form, and finds the way that is adequate for the
This is the constructive use of wholeness of the other.
the daimonic. It is an assertion of one's own individuality
in relation to another person. It always skates on the edge of
exploitation of the partner; but without it there is no vital
relationship. (Love and Will, p.146)
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